S: Yesterday afternoon Zach and I were working on our half bath remodel. As his faithful assistant, I went out into the garage to get him a level. The garage door was open and I saw something fluttering in the corner of the garage. At first I thought it was a leaf that had blown in then I realized it was a bird...and he was stuck to a glue trap! I starting yelling at Zach to "come help this bird!" Our home pest control service put the glue traps in the garage to monitor any bug activity. From what we can tell, the bird, enticed by all the bugs glued to the trap, flew in to our garage and got stuck! I put some garden gloves on (Epidemiologist Sarah says "Protect Yo'self! Birdies carry the encephalitis!") and held the bird down, he was flapping so violently trying to get loose I was afraid he was going to hurt himself. Zach grabbed some goo-gone and a pocket knife...we weren't really sure what to do. Zach ended up cutting off the excess glue around the bird and then we slowly peeled his foot and wing from the trap. He had lost a lot of feathers but as soon as I let him out of my hands he flew away into the neighbors tree.
Z: This situation has left me feeling like I should I receive a guest appearance on Brawny paper towels. You might wonder, "Why is there no picture of this climactic event?" And I will tell you "When the life of a frail wild creature is in jeopardy I reach into my pocket and pull out my man card, which happens to be a knife, not a camera." Sarah, in an unusual fit of desperation, began worrying about the birdie's broken legs and wings and the necessity of a vet. However, with three slices of my crappy knife (A freebie from some guy who got ripped off by cutlery corner), I had excised the bird from the viscous prison of glue and away he freely flew much to our delight in his well being. In defense of the brawny man's position, I admit that initially I took the more scientific approach and reached for the Goo-Gone because the oil based solvent weakens the viscoelastic properties of most adhesives by physical dissolution, thus rendering the glue trap not gluey. But sharpened metal prevailed and my Brawny self overcame my inner Bill Nye. Also this resulted in two new chest hairs.